Searching

Genuflections and vows, consecrate the nuclear family.
The oak tree dove is dispelled, by the paternal malady.
His blissful innocence, mesmerized by the silver screen;
Falling into the slumbered cacophony, of a dark dream.
With maternal affection, she nestles the quilt over him;
Mournfully looks, to the empty oak tree limb.

He fidgets awkwardly, under the prestigious gable.
On the wane of years gone idly by,
The penultimate act, closes to jeers and a cry.
A blossoming Disa upon the rocky Table;
Welcomes the festal flare toward the sunset;
Bathing his summiting silhouette;
Akin the Phoenix fable.

Their iridescent lives permeate the pristine shores,
Gradually grouted, from urban crimson wars.
Amid the break-beats of the subliminal hiss,
Regretful tears transcend their heavenly kiss,
Spawned under the sensual spell of fool’s gold;
Within Lucifer’s Lair, beckoning, until eventually sold.

Continued lines are learned without frills,
In his art, the lie that reveals a truth.
A stalwart soul, steers between tantalizing tendrils;
Through the haze, appearing nervously noxious.
His benevolent heart, becoming impervious;
To the malaise, of the collective unconscious.

Note: "Disa" is an orchid found in the Western Cape of South Africa
          "Table" Mountain is from Cape Town, South Africa

First Stanza:
My mom and dad were married in a Catholic church.The first animal I rescued as an 8 year old ,was a dove with an injured wing. It recovered and flew out into the oak tree next to our flat. I loved TV and movies, it comforted me and kept me entertained, while dad was going through his depression. One night at age 9, mom unexpectedly woke me and she took me, my quilted blanket and some packed things out to the car, and she started driving...to another city.

Second Stanza:
I was in a new prestigious school, the best of all boys schools. I was different and an only child, so shy and quiet. My last name was not English or Afrikaans, which caught the attention of most of the other boys. It's a natural thing to find at a young age, to be teased and sometimes bullied. However, I certainly had no thoughts of donning a black trench coat, and wielding a fully automatic weapon into the classroom and blowing the f@#$ers away. The penultimate act, was my life of being a nobody and it was time to move to the final act. Respect is earned. Law of nature, survival of the fittest. By fit, it meant sports. I took up boxing,and all the popular sports. I learned to come back from defeat, and persevere at finding what skills suited my body frame and size, for I was not a big chap. One has to embrace loss, in order to build character, train harder, smarter. I rose up the beautiful slopes of Cape Town's hills on my training runs, and transformed my puney body, to achieve the friends, accolades and respect I wanted.

Third Stanza:
After high school, amidst college and my successful sports career, came a deluge of popularity amongst us roaring twenty somethings. We lived in the best quality of life a beach town like Durban could offer. I was among a strong, dangerous click of nightclub bouncers who were top fighters, powerlifters. We worked and played in the best nightclubs, while reaping the rewards of our talents. Unbeknownst to us, the rewards that started out as fun, turned out to be the cause of urban warfare and blood spilled, that tarnished our pristine beach town. The first time influx of designer drugs that trickled over from the West and North, had a profound and sometimes tragic effect on us all, over the last half of the 90s. Hearts and minds were broken, as the beautiful boys and girls of our group fell in love under the influence of Ecstacy (fools gold) and the powerful Trance dance music they danced to. Some of this music was laced with subliminal layers of repetitive phrases, that were wicked and not of God. This illusive belief that they were in love, was the spell they fell under to lure them to want more of the drug.

Fourth Stanza:
My time to leave my once innocent perfect beach town was here. I wanted to be an actor, or thought I did, until I arrived in LA, and saw the truth. The continued hustling, trying to get in the door, was another promise of lies and unwell people. I realized, I wanted it for the wrong reasons...the same reasons as the masses come here for: fame and fortune. I also awoke to the fact that, fame and fortune does not a true artist make. I continue to live my dream of having made it this far, and creating how and when I want to, without the meaningless demands and pressure to produce by the public and film industry.